Wednesday, August 12, 2009

The Emancipation of Me.... Me!!

It's time I freed myself from an unhealthy and near-sedentary life style. It's one of those things that no one can tell you to do. You just have to decide to do it yourself, and I've decided it's time to get off my fat butt and get that fat butt off.

I gained 8 or 10 pounds last winter. I had maintained the same weight for almost 20 years except for when I was getting divorced and lost almost 20 pounds (not a recommended method of weight loss), and when I was pregnant and put on 30 pounds which I lost in just under a year. Weight just hasn't really been an issue for me and not something I had to work to control... until now.

It's not even ALL about the weight. If my body is a temple, mine has been crumbling. I have way too many aches and pains, tension in my neck most of the time and a general lack of energy. I convinced myself that I had a thyroid condition, but I had my doctor check it, and he reassured me that I'm just a hypochondriac and don't have a life-long condition requiring medication.

It's easy to make up excuses of why not to exercise:
  • can't afford to go to the gym
  • no one available to watch child/ren
  • don't have the right clothes/shoes to wear
  • don't have the time
  • don't feel good right now; maybe when I feel better
  • it's raining
  • don't like to sweat.

What convinced me to do something (other than make excuses)? The sight of myself in shorts and (Egad! The horror!) a bathing suit. I've always had this dream that when I was 50 I wanted to be in shape like Tina Turner or Cher or Madonna. That's only 5 years + away, and it's not going to happen overnight.

Last week, I put together a playlist on my Ipod of music that keeps me moving, put on some comfortable clothes and sneakers and started walking. And I don't mean strolling. I mean if I was going any faster, I'd be running. When I was on vacation, I did 2 1/2 or 3 miles since it was on the coast and flatter. At home, it's a lot of steep up and down hill, so I'm doing 2 miles. So far, I've walked about 13 miles total, and I have to admit, I like how it makes me feel. I have more energy after I walk, and I like the happy endorphins I feel when I'm done.

The weird part is that I don't want to do it before I go. I feel like I have a devil on one shoulder and an angel on another. The devil is making excuses and the angel is telling me how good it is for me and how good I'll feel. When I get back, I can't wait to go out again. Unfortunately, that feeling passes, and I'll struggle again the next time. As my friend, Ellen so aptly put it, "Inertia is a wicked, wicked force."

Tomorrow, I'll talk about what I'm doing on the inside to change how I feel and look.

6 comments:

Tammie said...

ive been feeling the same way lately. i think ive put on five pounds in the last year or so. and im sure most people wouldnt consider me fat, i just dont feel like im at my best, you know?
ive been trying to get back in the habit of walking nightly or at least every other night. if i cant do that i try to do the Wii Fit. I love the yoga, and while im sure its not the same as a real yoga class, i feel like its better than nothing on days when i cant always do "real" exercise.

Liz said...

Good for you! I am the same way - I need music to keep me going. If I've got i on the mp3 player I tend to move a lot faster. Good luck!

Aunt Becky said...

I went back on WW on Monday and the gym starts next Monday. I'm pumped.

~Molly~ said...

My devil is SO winning right now!!! Congratulations on beating yours! I'm inspired to get back into it. Walking really does make me feel better.

Molly

Apron Thrift Girl said...

I could have written this word for word. Well except the actual part of exercising since I'm still lacking in that dept. I am so proud of you for getting up and getting going. My goal is once we move so will I.

Carol said...

We should maintain our weight by some exercises it's good for health!!!
Carol
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